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My heart is crying for Millie

I feel completely ruined by the loss of Millie. Millie was from Oklahoma. She was diagnosed with stage-4 neuroblastoma back in June 2019. She was getting treatment in OU Children's Hospital. My heart broke into pieces when she was sent home for hospice care.

She was one of the children I have been closely following on the social media. I can't fathom how much pain she has been through or what difficulties their parents have faced. She was a brave and strong fighter, and also so beautiful and full of love. She has taught me so much about how to battle the worst disease ever while keep smiling. I have learned a lot from their family about how to be perfect, responsible and caring parents.

One of Millie's last wishes was to go fishing. To go fishing... That simple and innocent. What else could a 3-year-old toddler ask for? Fortunately, a non-profit organization called The Mack Impact helped her and the family make unforgettable memories of that special fishing day, approximately a week before she has gained her angel wings. It brings me to tears most of the time when I have a look at the photo below. It is very hard for me to look at the photographed memories, so heavy. I wish I could be near her and the family along their battle. I wish I could meet her in person.

Even though I never met her in person, she was always in my thoughts and prayers. Checking her status was the very first thing I've been doing for a while whenever I opened up my Fb. I shed loads of tears when I read the saddest update that nobody can ever imagine how hard to post. Coincidentally, I got the news short after I had discovered the song "Angel Baby" by Rosie & The Originals, and listened over and over again (it is also the favorite song of Callie - another baby girl fighting neuroblastoma at the moment). That got me traumatized, I couldn't neither sleep nor work the following 24 hours. I can't fathom the feeling of the family.

Millie was full of love. She is so much loved by many people. So much pure unconditional love from her family. People continuously sent her loves and prayers. She inspired hundreds of people, including myself.

Millie literally reminded me that there are real problems we people should prioritize and deal with rather than shooting rockets to the space. And that nothing is ever more valuable and important than our children. Millie opened my eyes and made me realize that I need to deviate from my current career aspirations. I feel so sorry and guilty that I chose to be an engineer, not an oncologist. I wish people around me had encouraged me to be a doctor by telling "There is a serious problem called childhood cancer, and you can save children" instead of how much money I could possibly earn or what expensive cars I could drive as the outcome.

I followed her journey on Fb: Millie's Miracle. Many thanks to her lovely parents for sharing it.

Love you, Millie!❤️ I will always do, I miss you a lot, and I promise I will do my best for your friends battling the same enemy. #forever3 #MilliesMiracle


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